2005-09-25

learning from weakness & exhaustion

Why have I been feeling so incredibly exhausted recently?

Silly question.

It seems that I'm in the midst of one of those good old bouts of 'hypersomina'. I'm hardly up at all these days, and seem to feel even more unrefreshed from sleep than I usually do.

When I woke up earlier from my afternoon nap, I felt just as exhausted as I had done before I slept.

So it's doing little bits, in little doses at the moment. I have no other choice in the matter anyway!

In these times, at least for me, it makes me grateful for every little ounce of energy I have.

My actions need to be far more measured, which means I am grateful if I can sit at the computer for ten minutes. But equally grateful when my body makes it clear that now it's time to stop, and rest.

It seems that taking time for myself, to stop, and take stock of my 'inner balance' comes into focus much more, when my waking hours are so limited, and my energy reserves so scarce.

If the chinese symbol for crisis is the same symbol as for opportunity, then I will see this as an opportunity to learn about myself. This weakness and exhaustion teaches me eternal lessons that I would not otherwise even consider if I were full of health and energy.

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